Emotions, senses, and staying power in Aspies (A page from the handbook for Nuerotypicals as written by me) Man that's a long title.

So far this week at work I have been shot in the eye with a laser scanner (For a joke), had the Best Buy alarms go off right next to me many times, Been pulled in a billion directions, and lastly had my new boss show up randomly with another higher up and tear our part of the store apart and put it back together because everything was apparently wrong.

Now, I do have the ability to act nuerotypical better than most Aspie people, and I do have a high tolerance to most of these things even though some can break through my defenses. There is no blocking a laser hitting your eye, and it immediately causing a sharp pain in various brain areas. (not joking), and the alarm when it's so close causes more pain in my ears, chest, and head.
Add on the stress of the random boss showing up (who himself was stressing out, with the other guy)

They both were very business oriented, straight to business oriented...Which I understand but at the same time is another set of rules I'm not overly understanding of or happy with. But I play along, listen to the grade A overly simplified explanations of how things work. "You know, how you walk into a store in California, and new York and they look the same, that's what we are going for." dO_ob...yeah?

Sometimes I'm too smart for my own good I guess, but the point of all of this, long winded or not is that these sensory issues stay long after the stimuli leaves. Our senses: Taste, touch, smell, hearing, sight, and emotions all have a ridiculous staying power. I felt where the laser hit my eye for 2 days. The first second of the alarms instills a shock that lasts for a good 30 minutes to an hour, not to mention the actual sound leaving a ringing that may last just as long.

The emotional stuff like stress, anger, fear, as well as the good emotions can last quite a while after (the negative ones last longer and often burn stronger) So having those higher ups around lasted well into the night after they left. They are cool guys mind you, but their stress is catching is all I'm saying.

Yes I know. Aspie people are not supposed to be able to feel/show emotion which by the way is completely wrong. In the original diagnoses yes we can't "show" emotion, and we have trouble understanding others, but A: that doesn't mean we don't' have our own, and B: as we learn the reasoning behind others emotions they weigh so heavily on us that we sometimes cannot distinguish them from our own.

And again all of these things stay with us for hours if not days. I do have a ridiculous defense built up to where I can withstand almost everything that's thrown at me, but even still there's a limit. I mean I can get cussed out by a customer, maintain my composure and even talk them down, but the implications of a boss being upset about how things are running, or being pulled over by cops, or interviews, any situation that matters there is a huge stress level.

So no matter how high functions the person you are talking to is please do realize that to you it's just a loud noise, or an angry customer, or a "stressful" boss. For us it's the worst version of all of that, plus all the flickering screens, billions of noises, emotions, and most of us also sense/feel light on our skin as well which is pretty annoying. So add on to the fact that all of these things are long lasting, and it's not overly fun. Imagine listening to 5 songs from various genres, and then having a reverb and an echo on them.

All I'm saying is, you have to realize that this isn't just "the world" for us, it's not as easy as it is for everyone else. We have to put on a shell, block out as much as we can, and face some things head on. All that being said, I see this more as an out of control superpower, than a disability. Just saying.

Pretzel Hot Dog Kolache

~ Pretzel Hot Dog Kolache ~

Ingredients:

8-12 hot dogs, or 6-8 sausages
1 1/2 cups warm water
2 tablespoons light brown sugar, white sugar, or honey
1 package active dry yeast (2 1/4 teaspoons)
3 ounces unsalted butter, melted
2 1/2 teaspoons kosher salt
4 1/2 to 5 cups all-purpose flour
Vegetable oil
3 quarts water
3/4 cup baking soda
1 whole egg, beaten with 1 tablespoon cold water
Coarse sea salt

Directions:

Combine the water, sugar, yeast, and butter in the bowl of a stand mixer and mix with the dough hook until combined. Let sit for 5 minutes.

Add the salt and flour and mix on low speed until combined. Increase the speed to medium and continue kneading until the dough is smooth and begins to pull away from the side of the bowl, about 3 to 4 minutes. If the dough appears too wet, add additional flour, 1 tablespoon at a time. Remove the dough from the bowl, place on a flat surface and knead into a ball with your hands.
Oil a bowl with vegetable oil, add the dough and turn to coat with the oil. Cover with a clean towel or plastic wrap and place in a warm spot until the dough doubles in size, about 1 hour.
Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F.

Bring the water to a boil in a small roasting pan over high heat and add the baking soda.
Remove the dough from the bowl and place on a flat surface.

(here is where we deviate)

Cut the dough ball into 4 parts, and then cut each of those in half to make 8 (or the amount you need for your hot dogs/sausage. Flatten each piece of dough wider, and longer than the hotdog/sausage you have, and lay the dogs/sausage in the dough wrapping it in the dough like a Kolache.

Boil the pretzel kolaches in the water solution in batches of 2. Boil for about 30 seconds. Remove with a large slotted spoon. Place on a baking sheet that has been sprayed with cooking spray. Make sure they are not touching. Brush the tops with the egg wash and season liberally with the salt. Place into the oven and bake for 15 to 18 minutes until golden brown.


(Original dough recipe by http://www.twopeasandtheirpod.com/homemade-soft-pretzel-bites/)

Shady as the Tree is long...what?

            I have been doing a lot of thinking lately. About things I have been ignoring for a long time. Walking through the world with a wall up, apathetic to peoples reactions to me for so long. After all one of the lessons I have learned from neurotypical people is "Who cares what they think?" and "screw em'"

            Well here's the problem...I'm tired. So tired of being misunderstood. Constantly, and consistently. I'm tired of being kind hearted, and guiltless, and being treated like a dangerous person, a liar, or a criminal every where I go. And most of all I am completely sick to my stomach of hearing about how what I think I am perceiving can't possibly be what I am perceiving. Because honestly there is no way to misconstrue they way people act toward me.

            Cops pull me over because I'm "acting suspicious," and even sometimes ask to search my car. When I walk into a store alone and look around like everyone else I am singled out by employees as the guy to watch. Look out guys, I might walk out with this washer dryer combo. When other kids cheated off me in school I was the one who was blamed even though I was the smarter student.

            I've turned in papers for class and been accused of plagiarism in front of the entire class. "We need to have a little chat about plagiarism Mr. McConnell." Well...please do go on. I've written over 100 songs, and several stories." And after a spur of the moment in class writing assignment the class stood silences by what I wrote and was forced to read.

            When I offer people advice I am asked "oh yeah?...did you just make that up?" or "where did you hear that?" in a tone of complete disregard. When I give an opinion at all it often falls on def ears in classes, in public, with random individuals.

            In interviews I am often asked if my resume is real, or if I made anything up. "I'm sorry where exactly did I write astronaut farmer on here?" Also...A horrid figure from my past who was closest to me convinced everyone around me that I was some monster who abused her, and stole money from her.

She succeeded quit well I might add, turning my closest friends against me, and the majority of the classmates that I grew up from middle school with. Yet no charges were ever filed because I had never done any of it. Which bring up the question. Why?

Why is it so easy to believe this? To see me as untrustworthy, a liar, a fake, someone with no honor, a monster, a fiend, I can't think of a worse word at the moment but "____" <- whatever goes there. I have a theory. More fact than theory at this point but here goes...

As a child I got mocked endlessly, and no matter how I tried to fit in it continued. I can remember in kindergarten not being allowed to play with the other kids because I was "different," all the way to middle school where I was given permission from my assistant principle to fight back against the people picking on me, and so on.

But the entire time growing up I was learning. Learning what sarcasm was, and that people lie, and do not have your best interest in mind. Learning that there was some sort of class system I was not a part of, and that even within the system there were people in other classes who could not be a part of higher ones. I.e. Popular and unpopular.

And most of all...learning what NOT to do so I could limit the amount I was singled out and mocked.
Let me break down how that feels. You show up to the same situation, remember all the bad things that happened the last time you tried to interact in that situation, and what went wrong. You plan out what you are going to say and do based on what happened before.

the entire time in constant fear of being "outed" or "found out." You try a different approach this time...get a little farther, avoid the inevitable for as long as you can, and there...right there that's the problem.

You see the more you try to act normal, and emulate people, the more you seem like your hiding something. Your not being yourself, you must be a fake. You must have mal intent. You must be here for a malicious purpose. No...actually I just wanted a coffee, and now to be left alone.

I am pretending to be neurotypical, and these days I am pretty good at it, but every single time I go out. unless it's a place where I am a regular and the people have gotten time to get to know me, I am looked at with fear, or distrust.

And for the people (like some of the people close to me) who think it's some sort of distorted perspective I say this...

"Oh you've got the paperwork for your sticker that's out? ok...Do you mind if I search your car?" is not a normal response from a cop if they think your an upright guy.

"So um...everything on your resume is correct right? I wouldn't want to look into anything and embarrass anybody." is not an appropriate or normal interview question unless you think the person is misrepresenting themselves.

When they get your order wrong at a restaurant, and you tell them about it, aren't they supposed to fix it instead of accusing you of ordering something and then saying you just don't want it? Even when your receipt says different?

And managers don't just send employees to have their conversation closer to a person unless they believe that person has the intent of stealing.

I have millions more in my head but that's just it. If my "perception" is skewed in ANY way, it's in by being told that the things I know to be true are somehow being misunderstood by me. Do you have any idea how hard it is to believe in yourself when every idiot around you believes what you are perceiving with your own cognitive ability is flat out wrong?  That's what I call Twilight Zoning someone, and it is killing me. It's like learning a language and having someone who speaks it tell you everything you are saying is incorrect when it's not.

Don't we all want to be understood? To have our opinions validated by people we respect? To be credited with years of staying out of trouble, and doing the right thing? To have people around you who are proud of the person you actually are instead of accusing you of being a person your not?
A lot of these things seem to be missing from my life and I don't know how to take it or what to do about it. I am at a point where the people around me are tired of hearing about it...Well you know what? I'm tired of talking about it. Hell I'm tired of having it to talk about.

I do have a few good friends who understand me the majority of the time and I am grateful for them, but my fiancé is the only person who has been able to understand me for who I am. She knows what I am and that everything about me defines me. She allows me to be myself, and unfortunately...until somebody decides that I am worth hiring, she is an hour away from me at all times. That's why this matters so much to me.

Because the people that I need to impress...to get the job I need...to live the life I want...with the girl I love...they need to know that I can get the job done, that I am extremely talented in numerous ways, that if they hire me they will have one of the most outstanding people in their employ they have ever had, and most importantly (which is the issue here) that I'm not a liar or a criminal.

And yes I do have aspergers, but that is not everything about me. I am a chef, a multi-instrument musician, a graphic artist, a kung-fu practitioner, a gamer, at times a writer, a good friend, and a loving fiancé. And I am in no way a pessimist, though I do get depressed by factual things at times as they happen...

which last time I checked was just called "being sad." But hmm maybe that's just my "perception"? I think if people put a little more effort into understand who I know I am, instead of who they think I am...You know. I have no idea. I'm going to sleep. I hope this helps somebody whether it's a neurotypical trying to understand, or an Aspie needing understanding as much as I am.

Written in one sitting and not reread. Thought it was spell checked.
-thatonewolf

Interview With an Update.

I figured I would write a little update.

Some of you (if there are some of you) may have heard that I had an interview today. It was with a job placement firm for a Video Game Level Design (3D modeler) The interview went well though I was a little nervous. A very strange situation job placement companies are and yet I've done 3-4 interviews with various placement firms and gotten literally nowhere. Mostly because they claimed I was under qualified, or they didn't have the type of jobs I was after.

However this seemed different. The interview went well, and I handled myself and presented myself as best I could. The interviewer was nice though I picked up on some subtle changes I wasn't sure about. She said she thought I would be great for the 3D modeler job, and she was going to send my paperwork and portfolio over, but she also offered me a chance to do a quote for a Professional facebook creating job for an oil company which may or may not be a full time thing.

Either way, I'm hoping to do either or, or both. I'm trying to make enough to pay bills, pay off any debts, and save up to move on with my fiancé. She's been counting on me, as have my family, and It's about time my hard work paid off. My family has been struggling lately with earth shattering changes, and there are emotions a plenty around me. Me getting this going will definitely be the change I was fighting for.

I am also halfway through my two month candida kill-off diet. My stomach is flatter, my mind works faster (when I've had sleep), and I feel better. Still taking GABA, and probiotics, and fiber. More on all that later. Anyways.

Signed, The wolf minded aspie
-Thatonewolf

P.s. Expect more Animation projects from me. Here is my first animated short, if you missed it.

Lifestlyes of the Poor and Aspie.

I am at a loss.

I grew up doing the right thing. I told the truth, stayed off drugs, have a clean criminal record, finished high-school, Got my degree. All the things you are supposed to do according to "everyone" I did. And it has gotten me literally nowhere.

I have aspergers, and always had. I've been mocked, emotionally tortured, picked on, dealt with the awkward situations caused by not knowing social protocol. But I evolved, trial and error, even with the sharp learning curb. I have evolved into a strong mature adult with a fiance, in a very satisfying, and thoroughly thought out strong relationship...but

I sit around every day applying for job after job, sometimes 30 at a time...No responses, no nothing. And before you assume my degree is one of those useless throwaway degrees most people complain about after graduating. My degree is: "Graphic Design 3D Animation A.A. Degree."

A degree in graphic design. I have the ability to use 15 or so of the top graphics programs. Lightwave, Zbrush, After Effects, Premiere, Photoshop, Illustrator, Autocad, and even motion capture and 3D scanning programs. It does not seem to matter to anyone. 

And as I sit around all day applying for jobs until (like right now) I want to bash my head against the wall, my family is struggling, and my fiance is waiting in the wings for me to come through for both of us. And everyone, including myself is losing hope.

I am good at what I do, and I know I can basically do anything when it comes to graphics, but I can't even find an entry level job doing what I do. and when I apply for the proverbial "any job" I'm told to get in desperation from the people around me, I get no responses from them either. Walmart, Target, Best Buy, Fedex Kinkos. Not a single call back.

Meanwhile I'm fighting some parasitic entity inside my body that's been probably solely responsible for most, if not all of the physical ailments in my life. I've had to change my diet completely to avoid sugar, most carbs, all starches, no canned foods, nearly nothing. While taking medicine hoping I can flush this "candida" bastard out of my blood, and my system.

All the while my family is falling apart. Splitting at the seams. Nobody is who they were, or who we thought they were. My only way out of any of these situations is to find work...Work...Hide and seek champion of the last 4 years.

Just had to get that out there. Tip of the iceberg people.

-thatonewolf

It has not recently come to my attention, but always been at the forefront to my attention that most people don't believe a word I say. Mostly because the things that happen seem impossible, but for some of those things there were friends present when they happened. So here are a few impossible things, and some of the people involved. Those friends can stop by this post and back me up if they feel like it. And also should remind me of times I missed. So here we go:

(two things you need to know)

*A doodlabut- is the subspecies of human beings that is often described as redneck, or hillbilly, but are actually much further down the line and often inbred. I am not so much making fun of these people as I am deathly afraid of them because they move and look like zombies and I can't understand the doodlabut language. (gibberish)

*cornered wolf syndrome- is my term for the fact that when intoxicated in any way by medication, lack of sleep, or pain/injury I become extremely snappy and untrusting of my surroundings. (other triggers are: being downtown and stressed, and any confrontation with doodlabuts.) *Probably can be attributed to having aspergers.

• Felix Navarro:

My friend Felix has been a close friend for at least 6 years and has been there for quite a large amount of crazy happenings.

1: In one single day I had a French woman working at woodlands mall demand that I give her my hat, and repeatedly asked for it as if I would just give it to her, THEN when we went to Jason's Deli in Humble and I ordered "roast beef on a bagel with honey mustard and provolone" and I received a Ruben with avocado and bean sprouts, which (for those of you who know me) I cannot eat. And when I told the waiter I didn't order it, a semi-m.r. manager came and told me "you can't just order something and say you don't want it cause you don't like it." It took 4 min of arguing and me finally showing her my receipt for her to believe me.

2: On another occasion me and Felix were eating at Ihop in Humble and a shirtless sweaty Hispanic guy comes in and demands to see someone who works there, is asked to leave and then beats on the window from outside yelling. The manager stated "I'm calling the cops" and within a minute of her picking up the phone there was a siren outside and he was handcuffed and arrest.
 (There are many more examples of things he's seen happen around me)

3:  So one day me, Felix, and Robert decided to go to Galveston to practice some kung-fu. We stopped at this place called "The Golden Buddha" which was a little Chinese place near the seawall. There were no cars in the parking lot, and we were wondering if they were even open. We walk in, and see nobody, we wait a minute or so and a seriously stereotypical fu-man-chu older Chinese guy comes out and sits us with a weird look on his face. The place looked like a dungeon, and sort of felt twilight zone-y because he was the only person we saw inside and there was no noise other than that.
           He comes to take our order and we each picked an entree, and the type of rice we wanted (steamed/fried) but there was a problem. If you got steamed rice "you get moe meat" and if you get fried rice you get "less meat", and even though we got it the first time, he repeated it over and over getting more and more angry.  So when it came to me and I ordered beef and broccoli and told him I wanted steamed rice, he apparently didn't believe me. So he begins to explain it again. And when I assured him I wanted steamed rice he then pointed at the menu and yelled at me "LOOK AT MENU!" then repeated his mantra about moe and less meat.  yelling every so often "NO AT MENU!"
We honestly though we were going to die, or he was going to fade away and the place would suddenly change to a closed down shack with cobwebs. Creepy. So let that be a lesson to you folks...Look at menu.

4: 2times me and Felix's paths were impeded by an albino armadillo. Once in Jesse Jones Park a mother or father armadillo greeted us with angry noises and slammed his hands on the ground telling us to get lost. Apparently his little ones were nearby.  And another time it was pitch black on 1960 on the way to IHOP with Felix and he's driving, and yet another albino armadillo runs out in the middle of the road as Felix swerves to miss him.

5: The red eyed bird, and his horrible voiced light complexioned cousin. One time in Jesse Jones park, Felix brought his camera for pictures and we saw a brownish bird with a long neck standing in the water on the boardwalk. He took it's picture and in pure horror movie style it opened it's eyes which were blood red and looked right at him. Seriously scary.
            While on the other hand we were training on the beach in Jesse Jones and we saw this gorgeous white bird with a long neck flying over the river that runs through there and we stopped to admire it's beauty (pause here to put fist in the air passionately) But just then...it spoke. "WUAGGGHLLLKHG" Seriously one of the most horrific sounds ever. We were in shock. Several weeks later we saw another one and he landed on a tree on the bank of the river where we could no longer see him. But apparently several crows could. They were in the tree and apparently were yelling at him and pecking at him trying to get him to leave. He kept screaming his weird noise and after being picked on for a minute he screamed out again throwing his huge wings out and knocking everybody out of the tree. lol amazing.

• Patrick Alcala:

I seriously can't remember half of the stuff with me and Patrick (help me out dude)
1: Me and Patrick found some great steaks for a good price at Humble Walmart and were thinking of good things to put on it. So we went over by the cheese and were discussing things until an old grey haired Doodlabut woman in a motorized shopping cart wheeled up and said in Semi coherent doodlabut speak "You know if you eat that cheese you'll start laughing" I froze...and Patrick said "sure does" and we walked off freaked out. Shortly after, we tried to leave and at the end of the freezer case isle she drove by in her shopping cart saying "HAHAHA I'M STILL HERE!" (Continued in Mat Martin's section)

2: At Los Cucos in Humble me, Patrick, Tori, Kate and David were eating and I was showing off my new shoes when a shady (I escaped from the asylum this morning) looking hobo with a knapsack shuffled into the restaurant and past our table to the patio, where he sat down alone, plopped down his knapsack, opened it, and rolled his own cigarette after a few minutes of rocking back and forth and acting strange. At some point he was asked to leave because he was frightening the customers.

3: One time me Patrick and David went to a Porter Pawn shop and as we were walking in, the person in fron of us had a neo nazi swaztika  on his arm and I was like...um...uh oh....but Patrick and David had already walked in after him. Inside there were two other male neo nazi's one with a wife and child...It was...hilarious. And somewhat scary.

4: At "dos gallos" by my grandmother's house (mentioned later In her section) Me, Patrick, and David were checking out after eating, and an old man in a zuit suit and matching hat is standing there smiling at us and swinging a chain (yes like in the old days) Patrick said "how's it goin?" and a semi laughing way to which the man replied. "I'm giving out babies for free today...to ladies with glasses of tea...if you know any ladies who want any babies...just send those ladies to me..." And walked out swinging his chain. lol We see him in the neighborhood, and he has apparently hit on my grandmother before. lol

5: Our first and only time at HB steakhouse in Humble was very Twilight Zone. First off I ordered hibachi, and Patrick ordered Some sushi. We both got Dr pepper (actually mine was sprite) Anyways...it took forever for the hibachi guy to come, and when he did we had been waiting for refills...and when the refill guy came he filled mine and asked Patrick

"diet coke?"-him
"no...Dr pepper"-Patrick
"diet coke?"-him
"...Dr Pepper.-Patrick
(repeat 9 times)

So the guy pours a drink into Patricks glass and walks off.
The sushi Patrick ordered is on a plate being walked over by an old man...but he stops, checks the ticket, looks at patrick, looks at the sushi, and walks back to the kitchen. Then 5 min later he reapears and does the same thing and walks off...THEN an old lady confronts him and brings it to Patrick, Patrick starts to eat the sushi and sips his drink...what do you know? Diet coke. lol

6: One time me and Patrick and everyone else were at Waffle house and this guy came in saying something about a paintball gun, and kids shooting at him. I think. I'm not sure. He was speaking doodlabut and I could only understand him for some reason when he was talking directly at me. He was all sweaty and confusing, and obviously confused. He kept talking to people like we should know who he is and I couldn't understand any of it.

7: Another time me and Patrick were at Golden Corral and despite our ridiculously racist angry waitress we were having a good time. While a couple sat across from us talking about something. The girl asks the guy a question, and the guy answered it still eating. Apparently she already knew the answer, and he lied. Something about seeing other women. But ANYWAYS. This dude, no joke, as she is walking away and out the building starts saying "baby...babe....baby...come on! baby come on!...babe....baby..." while still shoveling food in his face. He was EATING while beckoning her to come back...wow. lol

• Victoria Elliot (Tori):

Some of the weirder stuff happens to Tori and not always with me. But here are a few with me.
1: In Galveston (with Patrick and David and I) A drunk Mexican man who barely spoke English came and approached us coming out of Joe's crab shack and I can only describe it as "worshiped her"? Giving her a few dollars, and some used phone/gift cards.

2: In Chinatown mall an aging sickly Vietnamese man came and grabbed her hand and in broken English he barely audibly explained something about "many died" and "like you." It was quite sad.

• David Alcala:

Way too many to remember. (help me out David)

1: In a Chinatown bookstore an older Chinese lady smiles at us as we walk in and start to look around, but her daughter or possibly granddaughter says "uh...can I help you?" in an extremely rude way. I said "oh we just wanted to see what all you have" to which she replied "um this is a CHINESE book store?" Like we were too stupid to understand that. I either said in English or Chinese "yeah I know" and explained that I was in school for it. She followed us around the store reluctantly showing us but really so she could watch us.

2: After ordering some of my paintings on smaller picture format from Porter walmart (mistake) I came to pick them up with David and had zero sleep. I went to check out with the picture all freaked out and ready to leave because of all the doodlabuts there and the skipping cd over the loudspeaker playing 80's music. And I handed the pictures over and am informed rudely and in an "I caught you!" type manner that I cannot be sold the pictures because they had had a signature on them and bla bla bla...and before she could finished I quite precisely and quickly shot her down by saying in Groucho style and with one breath "yes you can, these are my paintings, that is my signature, here is my i.d. with my signature, here is my graphic design business card, ring it up."

3:One time at Taco Bell by North Harris I had already ordered my food and Patrick and David showed up and sat with me waiting saying they didn't want anything. So I had already waited 5 minutes, and 5 more after they got there. I went up several times asking about my food, and was told they would have it right out. I go up there again 5 minutes later and she tries to hand me the number before me's food (which they made twice) and I informed her that it wasn't mine and I was the number after her....just as Patrick and David walked up behind me with their arms cross looking accidentally menacing....Yeah...I got my food, and was hastily and fearfully given the food they had accidentally made to appease the MIGHTY Patrick and David.

• Mat Daniel Martin:

Mat has also been around on and off for a long period of time, and has been astonished by some of the weird things that have happened around me.

1: A year after the original "if you eat that cheese you'll start laughing" incident. I told Mat about it, he didn't really believe me and me and him went to Walmart together. After a minute inside I saw the SAME woman in a motorized shopping cart, and her daughter (also a doodlabut) with black long hair in a second motorized shopping cart. I pointed them out and avoided them out of fear. While in the dairy section the black haird 40+ year old daughter drives out of nowhere screaming "MAWMA?! MAWMA!?" as me and Mat froze and looked on. "You SEEN MY MAWMA?!" It was...terrifying.

2: When we first moved into the house we are in now, I kept telling my family, and my friends that every time I get in my car and pull out of the driveway and angry wasp would pop out of nowhere and attack me. As usual I got laughed at and ignored. So Mat got in my car and I warned him about it. He laughed and we pulled out of the driveway and within 30 seconds the wasp came out and attacked him and me until we opened the window and Mat knocked him outside with his hat.

3: A few days after the "aint no change machine at the bank" incident at Porter Kroger me and Mat went back to get a root beer and as we pulled up in his truck. I "felt" something a little off behind us and looked back to see a 60+ black man with greying hair and a crazy look in his eyes running to a getaway car. I told Mat not to turn off the car or get out as we were stared at menacingly by the guy for 30 seconds until he got in the getaway car and sped off. As we approached the entrance the "aint no change machine" lady comes out and frantically asks me and Mat the make and model of the "getaway" truck. (it was later brought to my attention that a similar occurrence happened with me and Felix Navarro.)

• Victor Beas and Ifiok Udoh:

After Japanese class one day (I was explaining a parasitic plant brought back from extinction and taking over the University of Houston by leeching off of other plants and trees.) And the subject was changed to how I understand animals often more than people and how animals seem to focus more often on me than anyone.
While I was walking, and explaining, and being looked at by my group of friends strangely we noticed a pigeon holding a twig and standing by another pigeon. We passed it up but then I realized he was proposing, so we walked back a few feet and tried to help him out (since she was being cold hearted and ignoring him) but he got mad at us.

So we walked to the "mess hall" just a bit further and were laughing and joking about it when something even crazier happened. I looked down and a red cardinal is staring directly at me with a mean look and bucking up to me. And I'm like "um...can I help you?" and he hopped at me "threateningly" lol So I jokingly explained to the bird for my friends "you know, they are standing closer than I am so I don't know what your problem is." And finally I put my hands up and walked off like "lol ok dude"

• My girlfriend Kandace "Last name pending" Hudson:

1: While I was waiting for Kandace at willow brook mall in the Sears, I was looking at the huge refrigerators, and washer/dryer combos. When the manager walked up to two employees and told them to come watch me. I know this because I saw him say something to them while looking concerned about me, and by the fact that nobody who is mid conversation says "hey let's move over to that specific spot to continue the conversation" They came and watched me look at things too big to steal until Kandace walked in and they got an "oh ok" look and walked off as I explained to her the situation.

2: For the first several months of our relationship, any time I was driving her to meet up  with her parents, or to her house we would be greeted by a wreck, or a closed road, or a road block, and we would always be late. We even had a bat fly past us in the pitch black on our way to her house.

• My Mother Sydney Adams:

Often in Porter walmart we end up with weird ones

1: A little girl in a shopping cart at the checkout counter tells her mother "look mommy I'm a princess" and her hideously evil mother turns and with a smoker voice says "You AINT NO PRINCESS" which...was just wrong.

2: While my mom was doing self check out I was waiting but the entrance bench looking on, and out of nowhere a "Doodlabut"  guy wearing all cammo with a cammo hat says something to a woman at the self check out, she says something back, and he walks toward we with newly sprung tears in his eyes, takes off his hat and walks past me and out the doors in a way that justified the playing of the incredible hulk theme.

• Judy Collins "Dadaw" my grandmother.

1: While visiting the home tour in Galveston she was driving and tried to turn and out of nowhere a truck almost collides with us. A frantic crazy lady got out and came and cussed her out, while Dadaw calmly talked her down. The woman returns to her car and pulls a golf club out of the passenger side, then waves it at us and gets in the driver side and drives away.

2: One day at lunch with dadaw I saw a blue parakeet on the electric wires trying to talk to some crows and ravens. I told Her about it and she couldn't see them therefore did not believe me. A day or so later she was listening to KSBJ on the radio (which broadcasts from just down the road from the restaurant) and the female dj on the radio was talking about the underprivileged kids who are going to go to school the coming semester without the needed school supplies, and how they will feel segregated from the rest of the kids (unless people donated supplies). She went on to say that She was reminded of how the kids felt by the Blue Parakeet outside the window trying so hard to fit in the the crows, and ravens. Dadaw called me and told me about it.

None of this is as weird as the things that happen when I have been by myself. Here's a short list of just a few of those occurrences.

1: I was stopped at Humble Walmart in the ice-cream section by a group of doodlabut church youth group kids who forced me to take a picture with them "messing up my hair" for some sort of scavenger hunt. and one of them said something in doodlabut about me "nawt exshpecting thayut" as he goofy laughed and walked away.

2: After buying a new length of chain with Felix for a new chain whip I stopped for gas on the way home in the middle of the night and had a guy walking up to me with a knife. so I stood up out of the car and pulled out the 5 feet of chain and he said "oh sorry bro" and walked back into the shadows. When I told the clerk she didn't say anything but she looked at me weird. I either called or texted Felix right after that.

3: One time after making to Randall's in Kingwood, I was on North Park getting gas on the way home when my tooth started really hurting, enough for me to become agitated and defensive (cornered wolf syndrome) lol So...as I'm pumping gas, a drunk redneck woman in a blue truck is also getting gas at the opposite end. She yells "hey do you got any food?!" and I ignored her. She kept yelling about it and I ignored her until she said "HEY LOOK AT MY BOOBIES! DO YOU GOT ANY FOOD?!" and I tucked my hat down and ignored her.

My teeth were hurting really bad and I was not in the mood to be messed with. I was focusing on the pain to try and meditate it away when her boyfriend slams his hand on my shoulder out of nowhere saying "hey my girl is talking to you". Within a second the pain got extremely excruciating and I grabbed the guy by the throat/neck and pinned him against the gas pump...Not joking. I do believe he peed himself and walked off. I was texting Victor Beas before during and after this. (I do not like going out alone)

4: Not to mention the 6 or so times I've been pulled over by cops for "acting suspicious" and was asked if my car could be searched, and why I'm acting suspicious. And even having the audacity to come back to the car pissed off when they find out my record is spotless.

5: Pulling out of one of the ridiculously far away parking spaces at University of Houston. (the kind where you actually at a hotel parking lot) An older grey haired black guy runs in front of my car and motions me to roll down my window. I crack it a little (no pun intended Dave Chapelle) and the guy says

"Hey man, I'm not a bum or nothing, I mean...I HAVE money, I just need more money?"-guy

"um...ok? well I'm a broke college student bro, I can't help you."-me

"oh...well can you give me a ride? My wife is down the street and our axle came off our car which is
why I need more money."-guy

"Um...Yeah Actually I need to go...I have um...diabetes...and I need to go home and get my incilin....me.

This dude tells me he doesn't know what diabetes it...I drove off. lol

There are million more I promise you, but my point is. I'm not a liar. I have ridiculous things happen to me all the time. It's like it gravitates towards me. And just because it seems unbelievable doesn't mean it's impossible. Plus 90% of the reason people don't believe me is apparently because my aspergers syndrome makes me seem untrustworthy. Even though I have a clear criminal record and completely clean blood.
(this does not include millions of childhood misunderstandings and crazy stuff. Nor does it include some of the more insane things that have happened in the last 10 years.)



Case and point.
www.wrongplanet.net/postt138285.html

In closing, if you don't believe me. PYAW!

Borrowed Time (short story and soon to be short film)

"Borrowed Time"
a short story by Nathan McConnell

    On a now calm and quiet street he kneels behind a parked car clutching his chest with his left hand, trying to catch his breath and steady his heartbeat. A deep voice yells out "Where are you!?" as a small 2 door car hits the ground just a few feet behind the car he is kneeling by. Unfazed he closes his eyes and starts breathing slowly and deeply…"not yet…come on" he thinks, as he reaches inside himself to find the strength to continue the fight.

     As he hears his attacker drawing near he feels the rain come down again, He knows with the sound the water brings to his skin he will certainly be found. Knowing that he is no longer hidden forces the kneeling hero to act. Before his enemy realizes his presence he stands from behind the car and with a swift motion he turns toward his enemy, and flips the car on its side in the air. He then leaps up and toward the car and kicks it as hard as he can toward the unstoppable adversary.

    

The car hits with great force as the assailant looks up from his bleeding hand. A lightning bolt crawls across the sky like a mother looking for a child, only to be followed by the deep roar of a father's call. As the thunder hits the car is returned to our hero with the same speed that it left. He thinks to himself "No time…" as a look of fear is replaced by anger. He leaps toward the car and rips through the middle trying to gain the element of surprise only to find his enemy came with the now demolished vehicle.

     With the sound and rumble of a full force thunder strike they meet causing a bubble of energy, dust, and sound. Moments later the bubble shatters like a bomb in a glass casing causing and even louder explosion and throwing both adversaries into buildings across from each other. The hero's "tomb" collapses on him, as the monstrous foe stands from his. "Not yet…Just a little more…" he thinks.

 A giant flash across the street from the enemy reminds him that he has not yet won. The building pieces now no more than dust in the rain, pour onto the enemy as a bleeding hero stands with pants ripped and shirt vaporized. He stands across his enemy with as much power as his torn body could hold, his eyes glowing with rage, when across the radio he hears his name and then the words he was waiting to hear…"Were safe! We made it! Get out of there! Go!" His enemy looks up at him from the radio, and with a ghostly look of shock on his face he speaks…"you…you're insane…you knew all along and you still…" 

 Before he could finish, the hero drew even more strength in and appeared in front of his enemy with one final blow destroying the chest and heart of the once proud monster. As he falls to the ground, our hero steps back several steps…he looks at the radio and smiles…he looks at his battered left palm to feel the rain one last time..."ok…" he says…."Now…" He then collapses to the ground as every ounce of energy leaves his lifeless body.